29 April 2010

I'm Tired of Being Superwoman

I said this to a friend yesterday and she understood exactly what I meant. But after I said it I thought to myself that it sounded pretentious and self aggrandizing.  I certainly didn't mean that my life is so terrible or that there is anything so special about me as to merit the use of the word "superwoman".  I don't work any more or any harder than a woman in the work place or a woman in the home place.  I've been sick since Monday and I think I may be whining.

I like my independence.  I like to come and go as I please, eat when I feel like it, sleep when I'm ready and not talk to anyone if I don't want to.  And I am definitely not lonely. But there does come a time when it would be a nice change to sip a glass of wine with someone and look at the moon.  Someone who REALLY wants to do that. To not HAVE to take the trash out, paint the porch, argue with the neighbor who is giving me sleepless nights, carry ALL the groceries up three flights of stairs, or worry about everything, alone.

I have married friends who wish to be me.  If they only knew. They don't seem to realize how fortunate they are to not automatically find sleep only in the middle of the bed.  Fortunate to hear an other's breathing other than your own when you wake in the dark. The warmth of skin and a voice saying good morning.  Someone standing in front of you and protecting.

As I said, this is my choice to live as I do and I like it, most of the time.  But I'm sick and need spoiling so please forgive the rant.  I actually feel better now :-)

5 comments:

  1. after all is said... you actually feel better, and i wish you that feeling for a long time :-)

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  2. Oh I so totally get what your saying. Sending virtual chicken soup and some sort of hot helpful drink with alcohol in it.Lots. You know, in my experience at least, men suck at being helpful when we are sick. They never know what to do and retreat. Because omg who is going to make me a coffee and iron my shirt and crap you didn't take the dog out and now he has peed on my leg. Thats my experience any way. lol. Hope you are feeling better soon.

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  3. So my verification thingy was scaspoo. Seriously this is now the word I am going to use to describe my day when anyone asks. Thank you for my new favorite word. Sorry that was totally unrelated. Having a scaspoo kind of day. :)

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  4. Sharon,
    I knew you'd get it. I've had bad helpers & good helpers when sick but, I wouldnt mind a warm body tonight :-) Besides I'm done whining and thanks for the virtual love.
    Di

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  5. Anonymous12 May, 2010

    Just read this one - wish I had known about this bad (sick) spell. Reach out to me next time sis - Always there for you - much love - Janie

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