20 December 2012
a child's question
pulls my attention
from a book to his questing eyes
'did you ever fall in love?'
i scramble for an answer
'yes, a few times'
and he volleys back
'what's it feel like?'
i hesitate and search
for kid-safe, cookie-cutter replies
then notice that he's serious
as only a child can be
so i lean in and say,
'it's beautiful and fun
it makes the world a better place
you feel safe and happy, your heart
feels full and sometimes it can hurt
you'll know what it feels like some day'
he shakes his head
' i don't think i want to, grown-ups
say love but they're angry and sad
i don't want to feel the way grown-ups look'
'do i look that way?'
rueing the question before it falls from my lips,
and without hesitation he says
' yeah, sometimes your eyes get all blurry
and soft, kinda like the lights go out
in your head'
i have no words and as he moves on to another
discussion, as only a child can do, i stand
walk to a mirror
stare long and hard
willing the lights
to stay on
in my head